Thoughts On: All of Those Blogger Promises

I’d like to introduce all of my readers (read: my family and friends) to the huge rut I’ve been in. If you have visited my blog in the last few months or so you’ve probably already met, sort of. Like in one of those awkward situations where you should introduce yourself confidently to the new person you’ve just met, but instead you just make shy/weird eye contact. Yeah. But I’m glad I can finally and formally introduce you.

I’m not giving up on blogging. I’m not. I won’t. I’ve seen so many people talk about how so and so (blogger) should just hang it up already, quit while you’re ahead, etc. I’ve let so many little opinions on other people, which have nothing to do with me, trip me up and stop me from writing or sharing something I like or think. There are several posts that are 99% complete sitting in my draft folder. I’ve come into this space a thousand times promising that I’m “so inspired” and I have “so many ideas” and then I don’t post for a month. Some days I feel like, yeah – I could share anything here. I want to write my heart out, share experiences, and connect with others. Other days, it feels vulnerable and weird – feelings that I never truly experienced until recently. I’ve always, always been such a “heart on my sleeve” kind of person. I’m an open book and I have always liked that about myself. I still do, I’ve just become a little more guarded. I think it’s a good thing… I’m just working on finding the right balance.

I won’t make promises anymore regarding my “big ideas”. If I have them, ya know, I’ll just… execute them. There’s a big idea! I’m usually 4-5 steps ahead of myself when it comes to how inspired I feel. This is usually coffee induced excitement. I run to my blog and “shout it from the rooftops”, and then, well you know. You don’t hear from me for a month.

I will tell you what I want to do and what I hope to do: write, photograph, and document life with reckless abandon. It may be boring, imperfect, and unworthy of an audience. It may be a picture of something that someone else has already taken a similar picture of a thousand times. My thoughts and feelings may be repetitive and they will surely not be mind boggling genius. But they will be mine. I don’t have time to take a backseat to other people who are “doing it better” anymore. So keep an eye out on this space. No promises.. but I hope to be around more.

RailRunner 10 Miler

Nate ran the RailRunner 10 Miler a few weekends back. It was a crisp and beautiful morning to be out and about so early. I rarely see that time of morning as a fully dressed and presentable human being on the weekend. No matter how many Friday nights I spend telling myself that I will wake up early the next day to clean, read, blog, take photos, etc. Nope, it almost never happens. So when I do have a reason to get a jump start on my weekend – it feels so refreshing. Nate’s races are always a great reason for me to get outside with my camera in a new setting.

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Lately I’ve been needing the extra push when it comes to finding my creative energy. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m focusing my efforts on other creative outlets in a way that I never have before or what, but it’s frustrating for sure. While I waited on Nate to finish the race I had a good bit of time to myself to just be. I had no where to go and no one to converse with. It was just me and my camera… and it was nice.

Now that the weather is warming up I can feel some of the creative juices starting to flow. I feel excited to share again, to get organized, to be more thankful. It’s been a cold past few months. I’ve been a little bit sad, too. Just a little – not like, woe-is-me depressed. But to the point where every blog post I tried to write felt laced with some type of underlying emotion that I seemed to need people to acknowledge. So I stayed a little quieter than usual and took some time to reflect. I think that was a good choice.

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I’m looking forward to sharing a beautiful, fun filled spring and summer with you guys! Nate and I have quite a few fun events coming up over the next few months that I wont want to miss out on documenting. His birthday is this week, we’re seeing Bruce Springsteen on April 8th, we’re going to a small Saves The Day house show in May, and my cousin is coming to visit in July to sight-see and attend the Forecastle Music Festival with us! Those are just the few things I can remember off the top of my head. Oh, and the University of Kentucky basketball team is headed to the final four on Saturday. !!! Life is looking pretty good!

Ashland and Celebrating Little Victories

These pictures are from January. This was the last day I can remember it being truly warm enough to walk around outside without a coat on before the extremely freezing temps swept through Kentucky. We’ve made it through the worst of the cold days and we’ve even had a 70 degree day or two this month, but it sure felt like a long stretch of I’ll never be warm again. I can’t wait to venture back out to Ashland on a warm spring day. We’ve taken photos there before (remember these?) but never in the gardens. What better place for spring outfit photos, right?

I’ve been working on some ideas for this little blog that I’m pretty excited about! Oh man, how many times have I said that, right?! ;] There’s actually some progress to be seen this time though! I’ve started on a revamp of my design – enough so that it’s up with just a few things that need to be added. I have 4 or 5 half written posts, a sheet of to-do’s/goals, and motivation like I’ve never had before. I think *maybe* I’ve finally realized that I have control over my successes and my failures. Everyone acknowledges that in their mind, I think, but then you have to actually apply that logic to your life. It’s not always as easy to take action on what you know. Sometimes it’s easier to binge watch episodes of Breaking Bad and wake up 30 minutes before work. Actually, that’s always easier. ;]
I feel like my mid to late twenties will truly be some of the best years of my life. I’m finding out more and more every day who I really am and that I am a capable, strong woman. I’m not such a pushover and I don’t accept being treated poorly. I have more confidence. I chase my goals and I actually believe that I can achieve them. Sometimes it feels like a small out of body experience when I’m following through with something I never would have done on my own previously, even just a year ago. This isn’t all to say, OH WOW GUYS, LOOK AT ME BEING A NORMAL HUMAN ADULT. It’s just that I’m so happy to be knocking down walls that held me in for so long.
I want to challenge all of you to think of something that you’re struggling to do and write down ONE goal that you can complete over the course of the next week that will get you closer to doing it. It could be anything. Doesn’t really matter if it’s something that everyone else does without an issue; if it’s hard for you then it’s something to work on and feel accomplished about when you make progress! It really helps to think of something that you can do NOW to move in the right direction because if not now, when?! I recently drove on the interstate for the first time, ever, in life. That’s not a huge accomplishment for most people. For me, it was a milestone in my battle with anxiety. So write down your small goal, accomplish it, celebrate even the tiniest victory, and then write down the next one! Baby steps, friends!

What I Wore:
Cardigan: LOFT // Christmas Gift
Dress + Boots: Express
Ring: Vintage // Thrifted
Necklace: Vintage // Family heirloom
Belt: Forever 21
Headband: Aerie

365 Days of Marriage in 2014 – Days 28 Through 47

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